|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 25, 2008 0:18:18 GMT -4
Caspian didn't say anything. He didn't know what to say if he had wanted to. "Why did you do it?" he asked. If it had been Susan that had done that to him, he wouldn't have done that, or at least he didn't think he would. You never really knew what you would do until the moment came. But still, the mere fact that she was alive and possibly could change her mind would be enough to keep the blade away from him. "You can have some water now, if you like." Caspian said, taking the glass of ice water from the table and offering it to her.
|
|
|
|
Post by katrina on Oct 25, 2008 9:31:01 GMT -4
"You don't understand yet," She said looking away. "Susan still loves you, no matter what they do, and becauuse of it you will always have your heart. But because of it you have never had to live without your heart, never had to suffer believing that you are unloved. Without love the heart you cherished will become the source of your greatest pain, a lifeless void that has no end, and it will make anything that comes mean nothing. That is why: Unless I could feel my heart again it only hurts me more."
|
|
|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 25, 2008 9:49:56 GMT -4
"You're wrong." Caspian said, shaking his head once. "You think that I've never felt unloved? I did for fifteen years, until Susan came. My mother was taken away, my father killed when I was five, I felt very unloved. And yeah, I tried what you did. Except a five year old doesn't have a sword, so I tried to starve myself, and the nursemaids had to force the food into my mouth and make me chew and swallow. It got better as years went on, but I was never really loved until Susan came. My uncle never showed my any fatherly affection, just simply a faint companionship between uncle and nephew, and all those years I know now that he hated me." Caspian told her. "Katrina..." he began again, "it looks dark now, but things will get better for you." he said. Caspian looked at the glass of water that he held in his hand, realizing that she hadn't even gazed at it. So he held it out to her again, "Would you like some water?" he asked.
|
|
|
|
Post by katrina on Oct 25, 2008 9:58:10 GMT -4
"No," She rejected the water, "Love of a father and mother is nothing compared to the love of a husband. I lost my parents and was taken in by my master, but it is nothing compared to what I feel now. I probably wasn't much older than you, by our standards, when I lost them, and both at once at that. I can't tell you what happened though, I wasn't there. But I felt it all before. Losing a husband and promised child is worse ten thousand fold. If Susan dies and you lose your son then you will understand and nothing, not even a small group of nurses will keep you from death. You would send them to the Firefields before they stop you from meeting obvlion."
|
|
|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 25, 2008 10:02:03 GMT -4
Caspian frowned and bowed his head. "I'm sorry you feel that way." He told her. "But you and I... we were never in love. I still believe that your memories have been altered." he told her. "But, I'm sure that someday you'll find a nice man and marry him. You'll have lots of children, and you'll be happy again. But I'm married, Katrina. I have a son. I love Susan. How can you ask me to leave all of that behind?" He set the water down on the table again.
|
|
|
|
Post by katrina on Oct 25, 2008 22:20:15 GMT -4
"You do not have a son," She said without thinking and quickly apologized. His words of 'encouragement' did nothing to help her. She loved Caspian just as he loved Susan and nothing would change that. She knew what she was thinking, knew what she remembered. No beast, of air or earth or snow or of fire, could reach the inner working of her mind. "I don't ask to leave it behind, but rather carry it through memory. Your feelings may or may not remain once you are free of the spell that holds you, but that I cannot judge for the time being. But never leave anything behind. Always carry the fears and pain of yesteryear. How else can the course of life be altered if we remember not what has already been done?"
|
|
|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 25, 2008 22:30:19 GMT -4
"Through memory?" Caspian's voice held a bit of anger. "That's selfish." he said. "Galen would not have a father, Susan would not have a husband... She'd be left to raise him by herself. She'd try to protect him from Lamont, I know she would. My cousin would only try and 'train' my son like he does with my sister, and Galen would surely die. Humans aren't like unicorns. What goes on in your fantasy world? I love Susan. I would never doom her to a life like that. Or Galen." he said. "How can you only carry through memory what is going on right infron of you? It burries itself in your heart." And then, for perhaps the millionth time since seeing her, "Katrina, I don't love you. I love Susan. My future is with her, not you. I'm sure you'll find love in one of your own kind, one who will live far longer than I. But I cannot love you. I will not love you. I'm sorry." he told her.
|
|
|
|
Post by katrina on Oct 25, 2008 23:09:41 GMT -4
"There is none of my own kind." She defended herself but looked away. He was angry with her and that alone was a enough to cause some pain inside of her. "I never said abandon anything either. The memory of her is what you carry, not what you do with her later. By all means, protect the gentle queen and her demon child, but when your memory is restored you will no longer long to hold her. I never said to abandon or forget."
|
|
|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 25, 2008 23:21:30 GMT -4
"But my mind is fine!" Caspian defended. "It's yours that has the problem." through his anger, which was rather hushed and quiet, he did not realized that he still held her hand from when he had comforted her. It remained there as he was oblivious to it for the moment. He sighed. "I don't know what to do... Katy. I'm going to talk it over with Susan. Let's leave it at that."
|
|
|
|
Post by katrina on Oct 25, 2008 23:32:27 GMT -4
"I know," She whispered as she flet her body growin limp. It did not surprise her, she had done it many times before when she began to lose the faint light of hope that came with Caspian's love for her. The light constantly flickered like a candle on a windy plane. Often times it went out and for days she would remain wherever she lay, never to move until something gave her some form of hope again. This thought of his mind being altered was probably her last hope before that candle would lose its flame eternaly. "and I will wait."
|
|
|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 26, 2008 9:53:06 GMT -4
"Good." You're going to be waiting for a looong time. Caspian thought to himself. But maybe not. Maybe he would see Susan again soon. Caspian hadn't a clue what Susan might say. She might tell him to let Katrina do it, just for the sake of showing her that nothing was wrong with him and that it was her that was so confused. Or, she might tell him to stay away from it, for fear that Katrina didn't take away any 'dark magic' and simply altered Caspian's normal emotions. That wouldn't be good. Len could watch her though, so it might be safe. Caspian didn't know. Truely, anything could happen.
|
|
|
|
Post by katrina on Oct 26, 2008 21:08:33 GMT -4
"How dose Lamont travel so fast that you can't track him and tell me how long I must wait. You do not need her approval for me to help you, I do that of my own will and so should you. She dose not control who and what you are any more than Lamont controls her. Why should I have to wait for her to come and why should you limit yourself that you won't even accept help when it comes unless she, the one who offers suffering, is there."
|
|
|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 26, 2008 21:14:37 GMT -4
"I cannot track Lamont because he travels leagues in seconds. And you will wait because I love her and value her opinion." Caspian snapped, looking down at her and realizing that he was still holding her hand. He pulled his away. "And you are in no place to tell me what I should and should not do." Caspian's voice filled with rage now. "And Susan does not offer me suffering." he snapped again.
|
|
|
|
Post by katrina on Oct 26, 2008 21:41:34 GMT -4
"Susan dose not offer suffering," She repeated his words disgusted by them. "I saw you crying in the forest by the river as she told you she didn't love you and that she wanted to give you her son so she could be with your enemy. Don't say she dosen't offer suffering when she brings your heart close to her with her spells and promises only to leave you. I know she hurts you every moment she is away."
|
|
|
|
Post by King Caspian X on Oct 26, 2008 21:45:50 GMT -4
Caspian shot up off his chair, ready to strike her, but stopped himself. He would not hit a woman. Not one who was with Narnia. "We've seen each other since." he growled. "And she does love me. Her mind and body are out of place, but her heart will always be mine. She told me so herself. And my heart is close to her because I want it to be. She has no spells to force me to do anything, nor would she if she could. I trust her completely. She is my wife, for Godsakes, and I love her! And you will not talk so badly of her, understand?" Caspian got up to leave, and had his hand on the door, when he turned, waiting for Katrina's response.
|
|
